I really like this parable. To recap, Jesus tells a story about a father who has two sons. The first son is asked to go out and work in the field. He says “No I will not go” but later changes his mind. The second one tells his father, “Yes, I will go” but never follows through. Then comes the question: “Which one did what the Father wanted?” The answer is: the first son. Why? Because even though he said “no” he later changed his mind and followed through on his father’s wishes. It seems easy enough doesn’t it?
But, honestly, are any of these sons ideal? Not really. Think about it. If you ask your child to do something and he or she says “NO” and stomps out of the room-- doesn’t that pose a problem right there? I don’t know about you, but my parents would not accept “no” as an answer nor would they wait for us to change our minds. If one of us boys were asked to go out and mow the lawn or clean our room or wash the dishes, there were no multiple choice answers. There was one answer that was correct. For us to say “no” was to insure some kind of punishment right then and there. We might argue a bit about it; we might whine and complain but, eventually, we knew what the answer had to be. We were taught to say “yes” when my parents asked us to do something.
I didn’t always say “yes.” Even though I was a pretty good kid I did go through a time in my teenage life when I started testing the water by saying “no” to lots of things. But I learned something very quickly. Saying “no” to my parents was the best way to create a living hell for myself. Saying “no” to my parents was a sure way of ending up on the receiving end of lots of “no’s” from them. If I said “no” to some work that I was being asked to do then my father and mother would say “no” to my requests to borrow the car, visit with my friends, borrow some money, can I go to the game, or any number of things. I quickly realized that saying “yes” bought the best results for me and my parents in the long run.
So, why should son #1 be commended for doing the father’s will? Didn’t he dishonor his father by saying “no” at first? Wasn’t his negative answer a disobedient act? Yes, it was but what seems to be important to Jesus is that he changed his mind. He thought differently about his initial response and decided to follow through on what his father had commanded. He is the better son because he changed his answer from “no” to “yes.” The other son is not honorable because, even though he said “yes” he was not being true to his word. What he said and did were two different things.
Here’s the interesting thing about this parable. It reveals a God who is able to be patient when one of us, his sons and daughters, says “no.” God is willing to allow us the freedom to say “yes” or “no” to his will. But Jesus makes it clear that what is truly celebrated is when a “no” changes to a “yes” rather than a “yes” not being acted upon. In the parable, Jesus is speaking about sinners who have pretty much said “no” to God in many ways: he uses the examples of public sinners such as prostitutes, tax collectors and others whose “no” was pretty obvious by the way they lived. Yet, he says, these eventually had a change of heart and became receptive to the teachings of John the Baptist and Jesus himself. They repented of their sinfulness and became open and accepting of God’s word.
These public sinners are contrasted with the religious leaders of that day who appeared to say “yes” to everything God wanted but, in fact, didn’t live it out. They were the arrogant ones who pretended to be in God’s favor. But Jesus reveals that God does not favor them. What they have said and done are two different things. Their initial “yes” is hollow and meaningless. They are hypocrites. In sum, Jesus is saying that those who were once disobedient but have repented will get into Heaven before those who appear to be obedient but are not acting accordingly.
So, here’s the issue for us. We may find ourselves in one of the two camps represented by the sons in this parable. We may be people who say “yes” to God’s will, initially, but don’t follow through. We know that we can be hypocrites. We can accuse ourselves of not practicing what we preach. The parable challenges us to be true to our word. If we make a commitment, as most of us have, to follow God’s will in our lives then we are expected to follow through on that commitment. Even if we discover that it is difficult to follow through on our initial ‘yes’ it is important that we try our best to live it out for the long haul.
We may admit, however, that we often say “no” to living out God’s will. We are disobedient children who will sometimes say “I will not do that” or “I cannot do that.” Fine. God is patient with our decision not to be obedient. But God’s patience is designed so that we might have time to reflect on our disobedience and humbly change our minds and hearts at some point. We have a word for that change of heart. It’s called repentance. We are given time to repent of our initial disobedience and turn our hearts towards embracing God’s will. Then, God will accept our change of heart, we will be forgiven and God will bless us with all we need to live it out.
This occurs for us in many ways. We may find ourselves in a situation that we know is not healthy in that it does not agree with the teachings of Jesus. Yet, we may choose to remain in that situation and not conform ourselves to the will of God. Fine. We’ve made our choice. But it is important that, in time, we understand the necessity of changing our minds and hearts so that we ourselves change the way we behave. That change of heart may be critical to our salvation. At some point, we must admit that we have been wrong and then begin to live in a new way. Like the first son in the story, our “no” must be transformed into “yes”.
That is why Jesus was often found in the company of sinners. He sat at table with people who were publicly known to have lived a life contrary to the values of God’s Kingdom. In doing so, he was extending to them an invitation to change their minds and their hearts. In many cases, they seemed to have done just that. Therefore, their salvation was assured.
None of us are truly obedient sons and daughters of God. God knows that and we know that. Only Jesus has demonstrated the ability to freely say “yes” to his Father’s will, and then live it out completely. His was always a “yes, Father” and he acted upon that “yes” in every way. We need help doing that.. So, the Lord invites us to the table of his word and sacrament so that we can be strengthened to become truly faithful sons/daughters of God.